Submitted 10 months ago by fashionwedding
As a wedding planner, I see it all too often. Brides getting in their own way. It happens with grooms occasionally too, but generally this is the brides domain. Whether its micromanaging every detail leading up to the wedding, or worrying about everyone else on the actual day, brides can be their own worst enemy.In the times when I have worked with a bride like this, I have been fairly unsuccessful during our come to Jesus talks. Planning is grueling and when the wedding day ends, I am unsatisfied and saddened that my bride missed it all.And I am frustrated that there is nothing I couldve done to make the situation any different.Over the years, I have gotten better at identifying these types of brides and before even one red flag is fully raised, I decline the opportunity to even meet with them. I simply cannot do it to myself, especially since it affects me so much while I am planning with other brides at the exact same time.But even though Ive gotten better at dodging bullets, that doesnt mean I wont get shot again (and again and again). I find that these types of brides are completely unaware of their actions and the ones that are self-aware can justify them to anyone that calls them into question.If youre a bride planning her big day, its important to know how to not let the planning process drive you to rush off to Vegas and elope. So here are the top 10 ways you could ruin your own wedding, and how to check yourself...before the wedding day is over and you missed the whole thing.
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1. Trying to Make Everyone HappyYour wedding day is about you and the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. It is a celebration of the fact that you found someone you cannot live without. It is not a day to make sure that every single guest is pleased as punch about decisions that are yours and your fiances to make. And no, you actually arent a bridezilla for expecting your bridesmaids to wear the dress you picked out for them to wear at your wedding.Weddings bring out opinions from people on every single subject: where they should sit, what food you should serve, and how you could be doing a better job with this wedding just in general. You could bend over backwards to make sure no one is offended, or you could pick the less impossible choice of doing the best you can and letting the chips fall where they may.This doesnt mean you have to start being a demanding and uncaring bride, it just means not to lose sight of the fact that you cant please everyone. Its important to consult with your fiance as well as anyone that is cutting a check. Past that, its your wedding day and you only get one of them so do what makes you happy. You didnt listen to 150 people when it came to picking your groom, so dont listen to them about picking your flowers either.2. Forcing Your Groom to Have an Opinion
I am seeing more and more effort put into proposing. Whether its because of the pressure the internet (or brides) are putting on their grooms or simply because grooms know its likely the only thing they have control of, guys are stepping up their game and hiring photographers to capture that down on bended knee moment. After that? Many of them want to be done.And thats OK.Your groom does not love you less or want the wedding to fail just because he wont come to a third cake tasting with you to decide between red velvet and chocolate. lf you force a groom to give an opinion and contribute ideas, you might really hate the ones he has. Then, you have to honor those ideas because you beat them out of him and youll look like a witch if you dont. I mean, why did you ask if you didnt want to do what he wants to do?Then youre stuck with carnations and daisies and beer flavored cake. I know thats sexist, but you need to embrace the accuracy. He doesnt care what the centerpieces look like and no, you dont look fat in your wedding gown.3. Believing Only What You Want to HearThere is a lot of bullshit on the internet. Ever heard of WebMd? What is their motto again? I think its something like It must be cancer. Running a google search or visiting any of the thousands of wedding websites out there can give you plenty of wrong information. Forgive my skepticism, but I dont think its possible to have Prince Williams wedding on a 500 budget even though a blog on Pinterest says so.Weddings can be are expensive and planning stresses everyone out at some level. You know what stresses me out as a wedding planner? When Im laying out facts and getting things like I asked my friend who just had a wedding and she said (insert complete nonsense that contradicts anything I am saying here), I know Im dealing with someone that would go to WebMd over her doctor.
Guess what ladies? The choice between roses or orchids is probably not one your groom cares about. Dont force him to.
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